Couples Counseling in Salisbury and Bethesda, Maryland
Couples counseling is talk therapy for two partners together. It focuses on how you communicate and how you treat each other, so that arguments, distance, broken trust or a hard decision can be worked on with a trained third person in the room. We see couples in Salisbury and Bethesda, in person and by telehealth.
Who it helps
The same argument keeps coming back and never gets settled
You talk about schedules and bills, and not much else
Trust has been damaged and neither of you knows how to repair it
A move, a new baby, a job change or retirement has shifted how you relate
One or both of you is unsure whether to stay in the relationship
You are doing fine and want to keep it that way before marriage or another big step
What couples counseling is, and what it is not
Couples therapy focuses on a couple's communication and interactions. In practice that means the relationship is the client. The therapist pays attention to what happens between the two of you: who speaks, who goes quiet, what sets off an argument, and what each of you does next.
It is not a courtroom. The therapist is not there to rule on who is right, and you will not be asked to prove your case. The aim is for each of you to say what you mean and to hear what the other person means, which is harder than it sounds when you are hurt or angry.
Conflict is a normal part of family life, and having it does not mean a relationship is failing. Counseling can help when the conflict has stopped leading anywhere, or when you have stopped raising things at all. You do not need to be married, and you do not need to be in a crisis.
Reasons couples call us
People rarely come in with one neat problem. These are the kinds of concerns couples counseling is commonly used for.
Communication: talking past each other, shutting down, or conversations that turn into fights within minutes
Recurring conflict about money, chores, parenting, in-laws or how time is spent
Trust: an affair, secrecy about spending, or promises that were not kept
Life transitions: becoming parents, blending two households, caring for an aging parent, children leaving home, illness or job loss
Feeling more like roommates than partners
Stress that one partner carries from work or from a mental health condition and that spills into the relationship
How the first few sessions usually go
You call or send a message. Tell us you are looking for couples counseling and whether you prefer an office visit or telehealth. You can start from our new patients page. You do not have to explain everything on the phone.
The first session: both sides of the story. Your therapist invites each of you to share what has been going on and what you hope will change. It is common for partners to want different things at this point. That is useful information, not a problem.
Agreeing on goals. Together you choose a small number of things to work on first, such as how you argue or how decisions get made. Clear goals make it easier to tell whether counseling is helping.
Regular sessions and practice at home. You and your therapist decide how often to meet. Weekly sessions are typically recommended at the beginning. You may be given something to try between sessions, such as a different way to open a difficult conversation.
When you are not sure you want to stay together
Some couples arrive already leaning toward separation, or with one partner far more hopeful than the other. You can still come. Counseling does not assume a particular ending, and your therapist will not push you to stay or to leave.
A structured conversation can make the decision clearer: what has been tried, what each of you would need to see change, and what you are no longer willing to do. If you do decide to separate, the same skills can make it easier to talk about children, housing and money with less damage.
Sometimes one partner is also dealing with something of their own, such as low mood, anxiety or the effects of past trauma. In that case your therapist may suggest individual counseling alongside couples work. If children are caught up in the tension at home, family therapy may be worth discussing too.
If you or your partner are in crisis or thinking about suicide, call or text 988 or call 911. Our office does not provide emergency services.
Office visits, telehealth and paying for couples counseling
We offer in-person and telehealth appointments at both our Salisbury office on Maryland's Eastern Shore and our Bethesda office. Telehealth can be practical when your work schedules do not line up. Whether it is available to you depends on where you are located during the session, so please ask when you call. Our telehealth page explains how video sessions work.
Rapport and trust matter in any therapy, and with couples both people need to feel comfortable with the therapist. If one of you does not, say so early. It is a fair thing to raise.
Insurance and couples counseling: check before you start
Coverage for couples counseling varies from plan to plan. We cannot tell you from this page whether your plan pays for it.
Call the member number on your insurance card and ask specifically about couples or family sessions, your copay and your deductible.
Our insurance and fees page lists the plans we accept and our self-pay rates.
A Sliding Fee Program based on household income and family size is available. Ask us for the application.
Frequently asked questions
Does insurance cover couples counseling?
It depends on your plan. Some plans cover sessions with a partner present and others do not, and the rules differ between insurers. Before your first visit, call the number on your insurance card and ask about couples sessions specifically. If you will be paying out of pocket, ask us about the current fee and about our Sliding Fee Program, which is based on household income and family size.
What if my partner does not want to come?
This is common, and it does not have to stop you from getting help. You can start on your own and talk through what is happening in the relationship and how you want to respond to it. Some partners agree to join later once they see that counseling is not about blame. You cannot make the decision for them, but you can ask what worries them about coming.
Will the therapist take sides?
No. In couples counseling the therapist's attention is on the pattern between you, not on finding a guilty party. Each of you should get room to speak and to be heard. If a session leaves you feeling that the balance was off, tell your therapist at the next visit. Raising it is part of the work, and it helps your therapist adjust.
Is what we say in couples counseling confidential?
Yes. Sessions are confidential, with exceptions set by law: a risk of harm to yourself or someone else, and suspected abuse of a child or vulnerable adult, which clinicians are required to report. It is also reasonable to ask your therapist at the start how they handle something one partner shares privately. Our patient privacy page has more detail.
Can we do couples counseling by telehealth?
Telehealth appointments are available through both of our offices. Whether you can use them depends on where each of you is located during the session, so ask when you call. For video sessions, choose a private spot where you will not be overheard or interrupted, and make sure both of you can be seen and heard clearly.
How long does couples counseling take?
There is no set number of sessions, and we would be guessing if we gave you one. It depends on what you want to work on, how long the difficulty has been building and how much you practice between visits. You and your therapist decide how often to meet and review your goals as you go, so you can see whether things are moving.
Do we have to be married?
No. We see couples who are dating, engaged, living together, married, separated or co-parenting after a breakup. What matters is that both of you are willing to look at how the relationship is working. To set up a first appointment at either office, contact us by phone or email.
Ready to talk with someone?
Call 443-978-8688 or request an appointment. We see clients in person in Salisbury and Bethesda and by telehealth across Maryland.
Sources
If you are in crisis or thinking about suicide, call or text 988. In an emergency, call 911.
